dyism

2012...they could not stop the beat.

2012-01-21T02:02:00.000-05:00

Music changes lives. People are drawn to beats, the lyrics, and the way others react when they hear a song. When I hear a song whose beats or lyrics strike a chord deep within my soul it goes on repeat. I can not get the music out of my head. There are plenty of songs that I hear and their beat is addictive because it's the current go to song or you find yourself in the moment - but there are some songs who change the way you choose to think about life. They give you added perspective on love, work, family, and friendships.

I volunteer with a nonprofit who believes in arts education and I remember fondly from one of their performances last season a line from one of the acts, "they could not stop the beat". It seemed like such a simple phrase, but after meeting an artist recently that I admire deeply for the thought that goes into his lyrics - I understand now more than ever that sometimes music can flow through you with no inhibitions. There are times when I get lost in the lyrics or the beats and I actually wish I could just play snippets of songs to communicate. These moments would allow some of those people the closest to me to understand a little better.

dyism:
Lyrics and beats will forever give human beings the needed energy to change lives in some way or another.

dyism...finally off of hiatus

2011-11-09T17:57:00.000-05:00

I went to visit my mum a few months ago while she was on travel for her job. It happened to be a pretty large convention and she was staying in the host hotel. It was obvious that the majority of people staying there for that particular week were conference attendees. It was the perfect city to have fun and catch up with her. I looked at the conference program booklet to make sure I didn't see any seminars that were of interest to me, which made it pretty easy to decide that on-site registration wasn't necessary or a priority.

During the time that we were there I would have lazy mornings, read and just relax while she was in the hustle of conference mode. We would meet up for lunch or dinner and just enjoy being together. I vividly remember one lunch because we were talking and one of the guys at the table was appalled that I was just chilling during while everyone else was going to seminars. At one point he looked at me intently and said "You're not even registered. You're going to miss everything!". I smiled politely and thought to myself that we came to this city for two very different reasons.

dyism:
Tunnel vision is only an impediment when you stop driving through the tunnel of life.

live. love. laugh - dyism wk of 7.18.2011

2011-07-17T13:42:00.000-04:00

I was standing outside getting ready to get lunch last week and a phone call came in with an area code from Baton Rouge, my hometown. A bit perplexed that I didn't know the number, I answered cautiously and heard a voice that I will never forget. For 16 years of my life, 4 days a week I heard the same voice inspiring and demanding me to be my best.

On the other line was the founder of my dance studio, Jerisse Grantham. Her love for dance, especially tap was infectious. Her studio was our second home; we were a family of people driven by a calling to move our feet and always "live, love, laugh". The last time I saw her was 11 years ago when she was preparing to have her first child and wouldn't leave the studio. I remember helping her lock up and telling her to call me when she got home. Ironically that's the first thing she mentioned to me on our call.

You never know how much someone impacts your life or vice versa by simple interactions. That studio gave me an opportunity to express my love of the arts and forever changed me as a person. She reinforced what my parents taught me in terms of discipline, hard work, commitment, and living every day with no regrets. It was the perfect call to receive after questioning the last few months what's next. Her last statement to me was "Stop by the studio when you're in Baton Rouge, and whatever is next will be better than the last."

dyism:

It's worth remembering the lessons of our past, to make brighter futures.

doritos, skittles, bourbon - dyism wk of 6.13.2011

2011-06-15T14:31:00.000-04:00

The interesting thing about writing about your own life is that sometimes people assume you're writing about them. Now I am writing about real time situations and people, but at least 50 percent of the time something similar has happened with someone else around me.

A few weeks ago I was having a conversation and we got on the topic of toxicity. We joked about some junk food being yummo like doritos, skittles, and bourbon - but they need to be consumed in moderation. It's the same way with people and habits in our lives. If you have anything in excess, you're backing yourself in a corner and possibly forcing claws to come out. After that conversation, I almost became obsessive with who and what needed to be purged and realized that wasn't necessary.

I've been so busy trying to figure out "what's next" that I didn't realize two old friendships growing stronger daily. They have always known the inner dork that I don't truly show to the world. It takes a special person to pull out some sides of me. All that to say one of them enjoys having deep conversations about self-fulfillment and he out the blue told me - know your worth.

dyism:

You need to add mental, physical, and/or emotional value in order to stay relevant in someone's life.

the single life - dyism wk of 6.6.2011

2011-06-06T20:07:00.001-04:00

The single life can be taxing at times. Now people are probably wondering where this is going and why this is the topic of the week. I was quite the busy bee this week. On one occasion, I was sitting in a car with a close friend and she mentioned lightly that she received a promotion. I noticed that I seemed more excited than she did about her accomplishment.

The next day, I was chilling with another girlfriend and she mentioned she was featured on a national network as an expert and made light of it as well. It got me to wondering if both of these single females had similar thought processes to mine. I don't really shout to the world or anybody when cool things happen in my life (confession, I do shout to my mum). I actually down play them for the most part. However, I will talk to my closest male and female friends more about my struggles.

Just as I concluded that single women don't toot their horns enough, a male friend who I haven't seen in ages tells me he's scooping me because I've been in MIA. I laughed and said ok. We go out and are shooting the breeze and just enjoying life. I tease him and say that he's more than welcome to crash at my pool in the evenings like he's done for years and he tells me he bought a house last month that happens to have a pool. I'm elated but had an "a ha" moment that it's not single women - it's quite possibly a single people complex.

We don't have that one person outside of family that at the end of the day will truly embrace all of our A to Z moments. Sure we have friends, but let's be real - there can sometimes be boundaries about what you discuss. All of this to say, I plan on really embracing life's moments that deserve to be celebrated. So if you happen to be friend and you're reading this - I'm celebrating graduations, promotions, learning to cook a new dish, hanging a picture, and well you get the picture.

dyism:

Everyone needs a personal hype (wo)man.

dyism wk of 5.23.2011

2011-05-23T00:56:00.002-04:00

3 months ago I woke up and thought something was fatally wrong. There was a lump on my wrist and it hurt when I repeatedly circled my hand - and I told myself it was probably cancer. Now, I know it's not normal to circle your hand repeatedly or assume you have cancer, but I did. I obsessed about if for days on end. I woke up nightly to see if it was larger and I finally decided to call the doctor after lightly mentioning "a lump" to my mum. I did research on web MD, consulted with my med school sister in law, and they both told me the same thing the doctor did. I insisted on tests and they found nothing. That friggin lump was temporary and caused by undue stress from a workout.

Right before the test results I mentioned it to the guy I was dating and to a friend at a festival. They'll never understand how difficult it was to open up, but more importantly how much I trust them. I have a habit of not sharing everything with people because I don't want to be hurt. This allows me to shield myself inside a personal bubble. I talked to another friend this week and he told me I give him the best advice, even when it's not what he wants to hear. I digested that information and realized it's because I trust that he will either take or leave my advice without harboring any feelings. So many people don't do that, so I keep many thoughts to myself.

We can't tiptoe around life or the situations that are presented. The good, the bad, and the ugly exist - how we triumph is the story of our lives. Somewhere out there this makes sense to someone. I'm growing to respect and understand that everyone will not appreciate, love, or tolerate who we are individually. And that's okay, as long as we strive to be decent beings.

dyism:

Cancer is an obstacle, not a death sentence when it comes to living your life.

dyism wk of 5.9.2011

2011-05-09T18:58:00.000-04:00

Every year for over two decades I have participated in the Lenten season. I can easily attribute part of this to my religious upbringing in southern Louisiana. I chose not to write immediately after Lent was over, because I wanted to make sure that the same feelings that I'm sharing now would hold true.

For some in my circle of associates, I went overboard in what I "gave up", but it was much needed. I gave up the following: pork, beef, and liquor. Yes, some of you are smiling because I could still drink wine due to the previous statement. I also did something that many don't realize is just as important - I added weekly yoga and truly embracing spirituality again. I didn't really share with many what I was adding because I'm a firm believer that sometimes you have to have personal journeys.

During the third week of the Lenten season, I noticed a great deal of people either judging why I didn't give up alcohol all together or questioning why I gave up so many items. I even had someone make fun of my sacrifice in their blog. The simple answer - it wasn't their journey, nor did they have a right to question my commitment and sacrifice. This year during Lent I was laid off from my job and simultaneously making serious personal changes. While Lent is over, I was able to reflect and realize that change happens for a reason.

dyism:

Sometimes an unwanted push is what we need to make the necessary change to be better, to challenge ourselves, and to challenge the world.

dyism wk of 4.4.2011

2011-04-08T19:06:00.002-04:00

We are surrounded by people who remind us of ourselves in some way or another. You can look into the eyes of most of your friends and always find a piece of yourself. I try my darnedest to keep in touch with those who have entered my life in a number of different ways that include phone calls, emails, in-person visits, and of course cyber lurking/stalking. I've been catching up a few days this week and found out one of my friends is engaged, one passed away, and another has entered into a new relationship.

The friend who is in a new relationship looked genuinely happy in her recent pictures on facebook. I remember just a year ago that she was dating a mutual friend and they dealt with every problem imaginable - emotional abuse, depression, and drugs. At the time it was such an unhealthy situation and one day she walked away from it all. She called me to let me know that even though she left she didn't think she would ever move on or find someone that could love her more.

Too often we forget that with a little bit of courage and time, we can do almost anything. This week has been remarkable watching people deal with life's challenges and realizing that if they take it one step at a time then life continues.

dyism:

Have the courage to walk away because sometimes the grass is greener on the other side.

dyism wk of 3.19.2011

2011-03-19T22:06:00.001-04:00

A beautiful clear night with stars shining never fails to take my breath away. It's one of the things that I miss the most about Louisiana nights. I've been sitting on my patio in DC with a hoodie on just soaking in the super moon for about 2 hours. It's inspiring and takes me to a place where people should be waltzing like Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers and living every moment. I'm actually waiting for a married friend to pick me up. I guess I should feel honored that they want to spend their free evening with me and the super moon.

So I find myself procrastinating because for once, I don't want to be fluttering about all over the town tonight. I will though, because I made plans and sometimes with friendship you can't be selfish. They need this free night the same way I sometimes just need to hear the voice of a loved one. Tonight would be a little more perfect if I could talk to one of my favorite people, but I'm stubborn and won't pick up the phone to call.

dyism:

Enjoy the simple and complicated moments, because they all pass us by.

dyism wk of 3.12.2011

2011-03-12T12:26:00.000-05:00

A few people asked me this week why I would ever consider it necessary or pertinent to place my newly unemployed job status on twitter or my Facebook page, and I laughed. As a PR/Communications professional by trade, our professional lives are intertwined with our personal lives and everything is scrutinized. So it only seemed right to let people know that I was RIF'd (Reduction in Force).

The truth of the matter is that while I'm talented, the last year has been one where "extra projects" have been the only challenging aspect of my professional life and where I have found fulfillment. When you wake up and realize this daily, there are some of us who automatically start making changes, and I wasn't that person. I didn't hold myself accountable and it was a disservice.

Sometimes when you aren't strong enough to walk away, you're given a blessing in disguise and people and things walk away from you. It can provide a world of shock initially but when you take a moment to breathe, you realize some endings are making it possible for a brand new beginning.

dyism:
Endings provide an opportunity to assess your foundation and strengthen the core.

a soccer dyism - 2.10.2011

2011-02-10T15:14:00.000-05:00

I try my hardest not to have guest authors in dyism, but my brother sent an email this morning that touched my soul. Armond Brown, Jr is one of the most enthusiastic soccer coaches/fan/player I know, but more importantly he believes in using the game to change young people's lives. Here's his email below:

"I came across this recent article on Ross Barron of Pineville High School. Take some time to read it, watch the video, and listen to the interview below the video. In short, Ross has Downs Syndrome and had never scored a goal in open play in his life. His passion and love for the game has been an inspiration to his team and everyone around him. Ross' team, Pineville (#30 seed for playoffs), was set to play Lafayette High (#3 seed). Given the odds, this would potentially be Ross' last game ever. The game was already in hand and the coaches briefly exchanged words at halftime. The Lafayette High coach had heard about Ross before the game and wanted to do something special for him. He spoke with his players, and I believe that they will forever remember that night for the rest of their lives. The final score of the game was 8-1 in Lafayette's favor.

http://710keel.com/amazing-act-of-kindness-by-teenagers-audio/

After seeing this, I could only hope that we can instill the same sense of kindness and sportsmanship in all of our players and those we come in contact with in our lives. Hats off to the Lafayette High School team and their coach. I wish them the best of luck in playoffs."

dyism:
There are times when the spirit of others, teaches us the spirit of ourselves.

dyism wk of 2.7.2011

2011-02-07T16:51:00.000-05:00

I compartmentalize every aspect of my life. Some think it's a bit neurotic, but I've considered it the only way to truly function. I cringe when different sets of friends want to meet each other, because I know they probably won't get along. If I didn't know myself better, I would start to think maybe I have multiple personalities. Rest assured, I don't - there are just many different sides of me and I don't share everything with everyone. Trust is allowing yourself to rely on a person or entity, and let's just say I don't trust too many people with my well being.

All of that to say, I am blessed to be invited to a few social outings a week. Some of them are pure fun and others are made for networking. One event last week stands out in particular because it was an invitation from a friend from college. I pride myself in having a circle of friends that astonish me when it comes to their advancement in each of their careers. I knew the event would be nice, but truly didn't think about anything other than showing up to mingle and enjoy a night of culture. My plus 1 and I arrived (yes, I said plus 1), and we were in for quite the professional and social treat. We both have an appreciation for the arts, but more importantly it was the perfect intimate setting to meet a number of people that I have wanted to talk to in a casual environment for some time. We found ourselves on a technique that I like to think of as "divide and conquer". When we attend events we typically split up the room for a bit to handle business, and then we just have a good time. While we enjoy each other's company, we both have different career agendas.

I found myself after that event remembering the importance of always knowing your audience and never underestimating the friends you have known the longest.

dyism:
You never know how far someone's network reaches.

dyism wk of 1.17.2011

2011-01-17T22:41:00.001-05:00

*I should probably be using this entry to talk about service and Dr. King, but it isn't one day for me - I live my life serving others.*

As adults, I'd like to think we all have security blankets. It's similar to
childhood when you had that favorite toy or blanket. My house burned down
twice when I was younger so I don't have that item that I've had for 29
years, but I do remember a blue cookie monster stuffed animal that I loved.
Now that I think about it, it wasn't mine - it was a partner to the oscar
the grouch stuffed animal my parents gave my toddler brother. For whatever
reason, I took that cookie monster with me to college and now it sits in my
condo's spare bedroom.

As I've gotten older, I realized that my true blanket back then was spending
hours in dance class or watching performances. It was my haven where
nothing but the arts could permeate though my soul. Lately, I haven't really
been paying attention to the arts, and I've been using a nifty pair of
oversized sunglasses that make me invisible. Yep, they make me invisible.
I'm not crazy, just quite creative. When I don't want to deal with a
situation going on in my life, those sunglasses become my best friend. I
rock them like they really can change some outcomes.

Today, I wanted those sunglasses but I did what normal people do and I
talked through the situation (then sent two follow up texts). And then
I cleaned and now I'm watching DVR'd
dance performances.

dyism:
Love is fragile and we are it's guardians, the same way a postman cares for
a fragile delivery.

dyism 1.10.2011

2011-01-10T23:38:00.001-05:00

There's something about words that start with the letter F. They are pretty much a necessity in life and there are a few that just make me smile: family, football, and fun. I'm sure a few of you were thinking of some other options. I'm a firm believer that this life isn't for the weak at heart and every moment should be one that you'll never regret, so I can safely say I have fun daily. Growing up in Louisiana and in a house with a father who lives and breathes football, at some point I embraced the sport.

I was sitting at a work event last week and reflecting on my life and a number of changes that are happening around me. I heard one of the best analogies that I'm going to remix a bit. There is no such thing as a traditional family; our families are the people that we love and support us unconditionally. They are similar to a football team, because every player has a role. At the end of the day, we all have to be willing to block and be blocked to protect our family. The question that most ponder is are the people we're blocking going to do the same for us.

dyism:
Each of our life stories has it's own perfect ending; we're just building the chapters every day.

*a special born day wish goes out to my brother who is the perfect blocker.*

dyism wk of 12.30.2010

2010-12-30T11:19:00.001-05:00

Some people have no idea my background other than the fact that I'm a girl from the Louisiana bayous with no regrets. Clearly by these entries, I'm pretty similar to an onion in all of the layers you have to peel to get to the core of me. In the past 8 years, I have worked for a fortune 500 company in sales and recruiting, managed a national dating agency's dc branch, and currently am serving the residents of the District of Columbia.

As I prepare to embark on a new mayoral administration in DC I see it fitting to share an experience that I call the sideline view. For five years, I have had the opportunity to get to know some of the most talented individuals that you could imagine who give all of their time and energy to making DC a better place. They are the amazing public servants that so many of us forget because we have one or two bad "government worker" experiences. This is the second administration that I am watching come to it's final hours, and a number of my friends are sending their final farewell letters - I can honestly say that I had the time of my life learning, laughing, and serving with some amazing cabinet members, press secretaries, and executive staff.

I call it the sideline view because you experience a world that many will never understand, the same as an athlete. You can only guess the sacrifice, the prestige, the work, and the amount of pride one feels after changing one life at a time. During my interaction with Mayor Fenty over the last four years, I had the opportunity to work with a man who believed in changing lives, government working for the people, and pushing his team to be our best. I will forever be grateful that I experienced this rare glimpse into executive politics and look forward to continuing to change constituents' lives.

dyism:
It's not a mere coincidence the moments that talent and timing collide.

dyism wk of 12.20.2010

2010-12-21T00:00:00.000-05:00

One of the most amazing and inspiring things to hear is the sound of thousands of Muslims praying as the sun is either rising or setting. Last week this time I was sitting on the Nile River watching the sunset and I was able to embrace the moment. There are so many people that will never have that experience, but more importantly there are some who won't appreciate the experience. The beauty of nature has always held a special place in my life.

Today I had no idea what was in store for me - other than hoping that I would be inspired to be a better person. One of the consistent thoughts in my life is that I want to leave this world a better place. The days that you have no expectations are typically the ones that become memorable. I spent the day laughing and living, but what specifically stands out is looking at the moon in 30 degree weather and thinking that a full moon is beautiful anywhere. Normally I would have marveled at it's beauty by myself, but I took a chance today and mentioned it and had a fascinating conversation.

dyism:
While history has the possibility of repeating itself, embrace the now so there are no regrets.

dyism wk of 11.29.2010

2010-11-29T16:35:00.000-05:00

It's ironic how everything happens for a reason. I pulled over on the side of the road to write this entry because I was overcome with love for my younger brother. He's always held a special place in my heart but I realized that it's an understanding we have but should sometimes be stated. I proceeded to finish my day of shopping and relaxation. Less than two hours later I found myself in a shouting match with my brother about why his 1 year old doesn't wear socks. Yes, we were really screaming about freaking socks. We ended the conversation with him telling me that I don't have children and should let him manage his household. Of course I didn't agree right there, but I knew he was right.

I've never been mad at my brother for more than 24 consecutive hours. It's always easy during the holidays to take for granted everything I have to be thankful for in my life. I don't fight with my family, I have 3 grandparents living, my parents are still married, I have an amazing support system, and there are so many other reasons. This holiday I was reminded in the most random places that so many people would love to be in my shoes and during those moments I felt ashamed to truly pick a fight about socks.

dyism:
So often we are only passionate when something wrong has happened; let the people in your life know how much you care whenever and wherever.

dyism wk of 11.8.2010

2010-11-09T12:49:00.002-05:00

Years from now I will release a number of letters that I wrote that will show me in a state of mind that most could never imagine. I don't always show emotions but these letters will allow you to see such a vulnerable side that is refreshing. They are directed at different people and there are different subjects. They are simply expressions that I never followed through on sending. Ironically, the person who I communicate with the most via email letters has never seen the ones that would make his soul smile.

I thought about writing one of those letters yesterday and realized my thoughts were better shared here. I have a close friend that I have known for over a decade and when he needs me no matter what the situation, I am there for him. I used to think it was enough but it isn't. I am an awesome person that holds high standards for the men I date and I'm going to hold the same high standards for my friends. Let me make it clear that we all have flaws, I just expect those around me to give the same energy in good and bad times.

dyism:
True friendships have no boundaries on what can and can't be said. They are similar in some ways to marriage. but there are unspoken vows.

dyism wk of 11.1.2010

2010-11-03T22:03:00.000-04:00

I could write about politics today, but I think I'll wait until the last week of the year. I write about my life because this blog isn't fiction. It's my story - my joys, my triumphs, my challenges, my defeats. Every situation that I describe whether it be detailed or vague is a part of what I am experiencing. Lately, I've had my fair share of feeling like there are a thousand punches coming my way and right when I think I can't keep fighting to succeed, someone else reminds me that everyone has issues and it's how we overcome them that makes us a greater person.

I was joking around when a friend told me their life was miserable and I said try me out, I bet there is worse. He said he hated his job, and I told him there were people that were counting the days for the next unemployment check. He said he didn't have enough to go out drinking, and I said there are some who want to know where their next meal is coming from. We had a simple laugh but it reminded me that every situation in my life should be seen as an opportunity or a reason to grow - and not a reason to sulk and think "when is it going to be my turn?"

dyism:
All you have to do is look at the glass of water and say to yourself that there is enough to have a sip.

dyism wk of 10.25.2010

2010-10-25T23:40:00.001-04:00

A portion of the national news over the last few weeks has been focused on education reform and how our children need a superhero to change the state of public education in America. The truth of the matter is that it isn't possible for one person to change years of dysfunction. This isn't about that though - the conversation started me to acknowledging that superheroes don't exist. They are people who over time have done amazing things and people put them on a pedestal, but they are human.

I realize that this is about to sound like I'm comparing myself to a superhero, but if anything this is proving the exact opposite. When I graduated college, I was more driven than I ever could have imagined. I focused on some lofty goals and I keep checking them off my list. Over the last decade somewhere along the line I stopped asking for help, remembering the importance of all emotions, and telling people how you really feel. I became in some ways robotic, focused on accomplishments and how I would check off the next item.

I almost missed out on experiencing and embracing life. I didn't go back to my home state and just relish the time spent with family because I thought I should be working, socializing, or "making it happen." I focused on a number of different friendships so that I could make the most out of all of them. I spent years in a relationship/dating someone and he didn't get to fully know me because I wanted to be the girl who tried to be superhuman - I rarely needed or asked for anything.

A series of recent events reminded me that there is more. Thankfully all of the aforementioned are still in my life and I plan on revisiting my list and including the moments that truly complete you as a person. Sure I missed some important family moments, the friendships are going to take work and that relationship is over but I don't have regrets because that's the essence of life. And yes, I'm just as driven.

dyism:
Superheroes don't exist, but each of as ordinary people should spend moments trying to be better people for those we love.

dyism wk of 10.18.2010

2010-10-18T23:13:00.000-04:00

I think I'm pretty similar to most people in being a creature of habit. I have my morning rituals that haven't changed since I was younger. One of the things that has always been consistent has been my morning commute to school, work, or extracurricular. The type of music that I listen to during that ten to fifteen minute ride typically allows you to understand my mood and the type of day that I will have.

I recently found a set of cd's that an ex of mine made for me so I immediately switched my music in my car and I was on my way to having a great day. Instead of driving out my complex with music blaring as normal, I was still fidgeting. That alone should have let me know I was throwing my ritual out the window. Parked at a stoplight I looked up and realized that a house was being evicted. I watched mesmerized as over 20 people ran out of the house and into what looked like a moving truck. At that moment, I realized that while these people were probably squatting, they were willing to risk everything to change their destiny.

dyism:
So often I find myself forgetting how I am truly fortunate for the life that I am living and too often we're not willing to go to all extremes for positive change.

dyism 9.28.2010

2010-09-28T18:08:00.002-04:00

On any given day when I'm having a conversation with someone or when I'm reading an article or blog, my mind moves in a thousand different directions. It's constantly stimulated and I always have an opinion. It's a rarity that I share my true opinion without seriously filtering because most people can't handle my truth.

Fortunately for whoever is reading this entry, it's raw and not filtered. I live in DC and we like any other metropolitan city have violent crime occur. Today I was chatting with a friend and we agreed to have lunch on U Street. I got into my car and we decided on Penn Quarter instead for proximity. At that exact moment on U Street there was a drive by shooting occurring and a funeral procession. While I am thankful that we weren't in the area, it dampened my spirit.

I've been reading messages on twitter and blog responses and I'm outraged at some of the heartless comments. Yes, gang violence occurred today and it's devastating but there are two things that I hope no one forgets: 1. The family that was mourning a child today and 2. More proof that our under served communities need our help.

For those that know me, my cousin who was raised as a brother to me was murdered by gang and drug violence. I remember sitting at his funeral and seeing undercover cops. I remember a community that was scared and shocked. But I will never forget sitting at his funeral in the front row and holding his child's hand and wondering what was next for her.

All of that to say....

dyism:
We must not sit idly as our communities and future generations tear each other apart. Individually and collectively, we must do our part to make this a better world.

dyism wk of 9.6.2010

2010-09-06T23:37:00.005-04:00

Life isn't for the weak of heart or spirit. I have a pretty firm belief in two things: there is something similar going on somewhere else in the universe at the exact same moment and we are guided by a destiny for the most part that preexists.

For the past few weeks, I've been on a whirlwind with work, volunteering, and of course socializing. I realize that it's all happened for a specific reason. I looked around today and felt completely content with my current surroundings. I am getting to know a number of people that have been around for years but are taking a larger presence in my life.

dyism:
Sometimes life doesn't appear to make sense; but everything is happening the way it was intended.

dyism wk of 8.9.2010

2010-08-09T00:37:00.003-04:00

Someone asked me why there are lapses between my dyisms sometimes and if it's writer's block. The truth is that I hardly ever have writer's block, but I'm not sure if I want to open up about my life some months, heck some quarters. But, that's the intention of this blog to experience a random girl's life.

I fell in love with someone and now it's time to move on. I don't deny that love doesn't just go away but I do recognize that it never makes since to make someone a priority that only makes you an option. Love is amazing and I don't regret a moment, but this single girl in the city is ready to stop sulking.

dyism:
The past molds us, the present is our training ground, and the future is the dream we make possible.

dyism - the true character of a man

2010-07-05T21:08:00.003-04:00

I've always believed that you have to get to know someone before you can truly judge. The email below from a DC resident shows the character of a man that I'm proud to say I know and admire:

*******

Dear DC friends/voters,

If you are unhappy with Fenty's attitude, his sometimes brusque manners, and are tempted to teach him some manners by voting for the other guy, please stop and consider what you'd be losing, and what you might be getting.

The District of Columbia is not an easy jurisdiction to govern: the Mayor has a whole lot of responsibility, and limited authority. I think the city needs a mayor who's tough, who sticks to his priorities and doesn't flinch at the inevitable criticism.

Adrian Fenty is goal-oriented -- he's made real progress on his three priorities: to improve schools, policing, and to rebuild the frayed infrastructure. And, to facilitate action in all three of these areas, Mayor Fenty has reorganized DC agencies and cut positions (risking union support for his own reelection) in order to improve services and free up money for priority programs. Agency responsiveness is better now than in all of the 53 years Norm and I have lived here. It's not that other Mayors haven't tried, and sure, some of the new schools, libraries and recreation centers were planned in earlier administrations, but Fenty's persistence and smart appointments have got them built. And the best police chief DC has ever had has transformed policing and lowered crime rates across the city -- though it's understandable that that progress is less noticeable in some neighborhoods because the starting levels of violence were much higher there.

And think about the children in our public schools: they alone are reason enough to reelect Mayor Fenty. Without Fenty's unfaltering support for school reform -- that is, for Chancellor Rhee's high expectations and tough decisions, and the measurable progress students are making -- will come to a stop. DC will then repeat for the sixth, seventh, or eighth time the shameful 20-year District pattern of hiring a promising new school leader to reform our education system -- and as soon as he/she started to make tough and unpopular decisions, the political leaders would back off, and the school chief would get fired, or quit. Vincent Gray has long made it clear that he cannot provide the firm political support that school reform requires. Should he become Mayor, our struggling school system will be back to square one, looking for a new chancellor.

Courtly manners and listening to constituents are to be desired, but without clear goals, direction and energy they won't necessarily give us good government. We still need a mayor who can get things done. Four years is a short time in which to reorient policy and improve performance -- and most important of all to finish the job of school reform. Please, reelect Fenty.

Janet Brown

******

dyism: Tough decisions are often the decisions that change lives for the better.

dyism wk of 6.14.2010

2010-06-14T18:41:00.003-04:00

People typically tell you when you're out socializing and having a good time you try to steer clear of two topics: religion and politics. I'm going to have to kindly disagree after having a weekend full of both. Sure by leaving those topics out of life, it's an easy way not to have disagreements - but it's not realistic. They are a part of our culture and account for part of our belief systems, and I'd personally rather know how most people feel about certain topics.

dyism:
It's okay to disagree about topics, a matter of fact it enriches your belief system.

dyism wk of 5.3.2010

2010-05-03T10:10:00.001-04:00

I heard a lyric that said even the best fall down and it completely resonated. I have never been the person who falls gracefully and immediately gets back up. I fall on my face literally and figuratively and then I take a moment to reflect on what just happened. Some people would challenge me to jump back up before anyone notices, but seeing as though I don't fall too often - I might as well remember how the ground looks on an average day. ;)

dyism:
We all have moments that test us, but how we rise is the test of our character.

dyism wk of 4.5.2010

2010-04-05T22:04:00.004-04:00

I was robbed at gunpoint about five years ago and thought it was the end of the world. I had nightmares for months and was afraid to be alone, and then one day I wasn't scared. I don't remember the moment that I felt liberated but I started living normally again. This made me a stronger person.

Recently, I've been a bit careless about my surroundings and a flashback of the moment when I was being robbed danced before my eyes. For that brief second I was reminded that I forgave the criminal, but I will never forget the crime.

dyism:
Life isn't predictable, but I'm pretty sure it's predetermined.

dyism wk of 3.8.2010

2010-03-08T20:11:00.003-05:00

Life happens, just like Jesus wept. I find myself writing because it's my way to release whatever is going on in my world. Some people use punching bags, others use recreational substances, and some exercise. Everyone has a way that they decompress and some of us choose to let other people watch. So get ready for an adventure; the last few years I learned something amazing about canvas - you can always paint a new oil color on top of the old. I plan on this next phase of my life being like an etch a sketch....

dyism:
Sometimes having everyone scrutinize you prevents a mistake from happening.

dyism wk of 3.1.2010

2010-03-01T21:31:00.002-05:00

The thought of playing games, going to game nights, and learning new games makes me sick to my stomach. I don't like most games because they confine you to a set of restrictions that may or may not be conducive. Games are a like a battle that has no war; in the end I'm a big picture thinker who lives in a world that has shades of grey- not black and white.

dyism:
Some people are destined to not only change the game, but make new rules.

dyism wk of 2.22.2010

2010-02-22T18:39:00.000-05:00

I think people have a personality "cycle" that dictates their moods and how people treat them. It's all about an equilibrium so you aren't stuck in a cycle longer than you should be. For some reason jerks have been surrounding me in every aspect of my life and today I realized - I'm so over this cycle. Sure they have been great at helping me grow my backbone and even teaching me a few life lessons, but who wants to be defined/described as a jerk?

I wonder what's my next cycle.

dyism:
Even jerks are good for something.

dyism wk of 2.15.2010

2010-02-15T22:42:00.001-05:00

I am a true supporter of social media, but realizing that it can take control of your life in a negative way. I have spent the better part of the last two weeks having a hostile conversation with someone via email and text message, with one or two minute phone calls sporadically. A simple face to face conversation would have ceased any confusion. If you don't truly pay attention to electronic conversations, they will allow the recipient to misconstrue tone and a number of other issues.

dyism:
Human interaction will always be more powerful than any application.

dyism wk of 1.25.2010

2010-01-25T09:59:00.000-05:00

I lost touch with a college mate of mine a few years ago and yesterday around 6pm I start getting text messages from an unknown number saying Go Colts. Throughout my Saints game, the number continues to text and finally around 10:23 I get a message that says "We Dat". I'm a bit perplexed but ignore it, because I'm celebrating my team going to the Superbowl for the first time in franchise history. The unknown number calls me at 7:30 this morning and says "Hey, bayou girl - long time no talk". I immediately know who it is and smirk because football was always our common ground during school. We talk for about 30 minutes and then both rush off the phone to get to work, but promise to touch base in the coming days.

dyism:
Our childhood molds our character, for better or worse. My Saints taught me that perseverance always pays off.

dyism wk of 1.18.2010

2010-01-18T19:21:00.000-05:00

Last week I mentioned that a gentleman bought me flowers and funny enough a few of you sent me messages and asked what came of the situation. Nothing. It was exactly what I said - a simple gesture by a married man who's wife was accompanying him. A matter of fact, he bought us both flowers.

I typically keep the "romantic" side of my life out of these messages, but it occurred to me when someone said I'm always happy and everything for the most part seems perfect in my life - that you aren't receiving the true picture of this random girl with no regrets. We all have bad days, and today happens to be one of mine. I find myself after a day of rewarding service and then painting some new art for the house, home alone and genuinely lonely.

And yes, I'll be fine. A little "me" time will be good for the soul.

dyism:
Sometimes you have to be in the dark, to appreciate the light.

dyism wk of 1.11.2010

2010-01-11T23:15:00.002-05:00

Every now and then it is refreshing to see people act without thinking of their next power play or their next chess move in the game of life. Simple acts remind me of the virtues that hold true across all disciplines. Last week I attended an event where there was nothing but huge egos in the room. While there, I met a gentleman who made the same observation. We started to talk and realized we had a friend in common. At the end of the event he escorted me to my car, stopped and bought me flowers off the street because he said every lady deserved random flowers. Such a thoughtful gesture...

dyism:
We live in a world where power is the silent ruler; but kindness is the vocal dictator.
--

dyism holiday edition 2009

2009-12-30T10:44:00.000-05:00

As a citizen of the world we all seem to reflect during the last two weeks of the year and some of us are left seriously yearning and wishing we had done more. The truth of the matter is that we are at this moment exactly where we are meant to be. And I firmly believe there is someone somewhere doing the exact same thing you are at this very second. We choose daily how we will allocate our time, resources, and love. For whatever reason you came to read this message, remember that nothing is guaranteed. While we can reminisce on yesterday, today is here, and the future has not happened.

A toast to each of you for being you.

dyism:
When each of us woke up this morning we changed the world.

dyism wk of 12.14.2009

2009-12-15T13:21:00.001-05:00

I thought you should all have a moment like me today. The comments and responses that I receive are priceless. You have no idea how they add to my life and the random moments that I share with the world. Here's one that was particularly memorable.

"These emails are one of the crazier things I have ever seen continually issued to the public. I keep wanting to let you know that SPAM is being sent out on your email account. Please keep these coming. I will find a hook for a TLC program someday. Hopefully it can get a good time slot somewhere between a show on conjoined twins and an intimate look at albino lesbians."

dyism:
Even when everything around you seems dry, there is always an opportunity for laughter.

dyism wk of 12.7.2009

2009-12-07T19:14:00.000-05:00

By the nature of my job as a public servant and the socializing that I love during the evenings, I know plenty of people; but I find myself hopping around in different circles. This can be great but friends for me are few and far between. And then life happens and you want to reach out and you're baffled at why you're drawing blanks.

I had a few of those moments this year and found myself accepting awards on random stages with random people. Don't get me wrong, on any of those given nights plenty of my associates were there; but they weren't there as my support system.

dyism:
If we don't embrace the true meaning of love, our greatest moments and darkest moments will be experienced alone.

dyism wk of 11.30.2009

2009-11-30T19:30:00.001-05:00

Some know of my issue with grocery shopping. For those that don't - the lines are long, my list is never in order of how the grocery store is organized, and I always come out with additional items. The day before Thanksgiving I went into a grocery store deep in the heart of the city with my cousin. As we are walking in, we see a toddler running(well their version) outside of the store. Pause - it's a toddler with no parent. I hold my hand out for the little kid and walk them in the store to security.

Everyone starts to go about their business and I won't because that child deserves more. Security makes a call on the intercom system and after about five minutes a mother walks up nonchalantly with groceries in her hand.

At that moment - I want to call child and family services, but consider which outcome would be worst for this youth.

dyism:
We owe it to the future, to care for all of humanity and not just ourselves.

dyism wk of 11.23.2009

2009-11-23T15:29:00.002-05:00

Lately, I have been jealous of everything and everyone and it has stopped me from my weekly thoughts. I find myself consistently thinking "why isn't that me or when is it going to be my turn or ...". It's unhealthy and genuinely not in my character. But everyone has down days; mine has been a few down months.

I'm finally recovering from a serious case of bronchitis and a friend came to visit me this weekend to check up on me and he reminded that everything happens for a reason - including death, birth, and break-ups. That visit gave me a renewed vigor to remember who I am and to always be about making me better.

dyism:
In order to grow, you have to be brutally honest with your number one fan and enemy - yourself.

dyism - October wrapped in one!

2009-10-31T18:42:00.000-04:00

A few months ago, I embarked on a journey that I never knew would turn into such a roller coaster. I told myself that it was time to re-evaluate my life, the people surrounding me, and define who I am. I challenged myself to socializing in some manner for 100 days in a row. It's been exhilarating, but more than anything it's been a way for me to understand who I truly am. I am at day 98 and I find myself exhausted from all of the socializing, but refreshed to have had a true opportunity to do a self evaluation.

In that month I fell in love with life and the concept of love again. I fell in love with my friends again. I fell in love with the arts again. I reminded myself why I fell in love with me. It's been a journey ...a commitment that allowed me to see myself through others eyes and I have grown from the experience.

dyism:
I challenge anyone and everyone to explore life and internalize the struggles and successes that we encounter daily.

dyism wk of 9.28.2009

2009-09-28T17:15:00.000-04:00

I've always grown up with a family that believes in the spirit of service and that small gestures can change lives. I recently talked to two people who work in the education field and were completely fed up. It was so disheartening to know they care so much about youth and their future, but were completely frustrated for different reasons. I reminded them that on the bad days, you just have to remember all of the amazing days. The irony - I should remind myself that the good always outweighs the bad and when it doesn't change is a must.

dyism:

Each of us knows someone that is making a difference, have we told them lately?

dyism wk of 9.21.2009

2009-09-21T20:22:00.000-04:00

I typically steer clear of sharing my true thoughts of love and any other feeling that makes you warm and fuzzy. It's a topic that I have not truly been able to wrap my arms around, and maybe that's because I've only said I love you and meant it to a few people. My life is an observation tower of people and their experiences. Lately all of my people snooping has been focused on a variety of age, gender, and the ethnicity of couples.

I am reinvigorated daily by watching the various faces of love. So far I appreciate puppy love for the naivety and seasoned love for going the distance.

dyism:

Life is just a case study.

dyism wk of 9.14.2009

2009-09-14T19:12:00.000-04:00

I don't really know if I should be considered artsy or someone who is comfortable expressing themselves through a pen, paintbrush, camera lens, or a pair of shoes. A few months ago I was hanging with a friend and he starts to free style. He happens to be one of the most driven and business oriented people that I know. This particular art form has always amazed me and while I'm staring in awe that he has this talent, he reaches over and passes me an imaginary microphone. And of course, I freeze. After all, I am that girl who makes up lyrics to Billboard's top ten. I think it shocked both us that I couldn't even manage to get a phrase out of my mouth.

I rewind that moment in my head often and realize that it's okay sometimes to suck at something.

dyism:
Life is a series of occurrences that mold us and change our perspective.

dyism wk of 9.7.2009

2009-09-07T10:43:00.000-04:00

Of course on Labor Day's long weekend - you relax, socialize, and
enjoy tennis. After wrapping up an event filled weekend, I was at a
stop sign minding my own business and started to accelerate because I
had the right of way. I looked to the right, and coming full steam
ahead is this SUV with a soccer mom not paying attention. I start
beeping my little toot toot horn and all I could think is that me and
my lil car were in trouble. I turned the wheel to the left and beeped
again just as she looked up and screeched on the brakes.

I calmly smiled, and she had the nerve to wave me off like one of her subjects.

dyism:
Sometimes we need to look out of the looking glass and embrace our surroundings.

dyism wk of 8.31.2009

2009-08-31T17:52:00.000-04:00

Every day for the past 40 days at 7:30pm, I've gone to some community event/meeting, dinner, benefit, happy hour, lounge, or performance to just be out and about. It's my own personal social experiment in my quest at starting a new phase in my life or as I like to tell people - redefinition. I have sixty more days of this experiment, and I'm wondering honestly if I'll survive. I've decided I'm going to have to add an element of yoga or something holistic. The whole point is to remind myself what I love, meet new people, catch up with old friends and see new places.

dyism:

Sometimes you can't wade in the water, you need to jump in head first.

dyism wk of 8.24.2009

2009-08-24T13:22:00.000-04:00

Hopes.dreams.fears. - I had a simple conversation with the stars above us and a lazy summer evening chilling with friends. No cares, no worries collectively but individually so many thoughts wondering between us. The simple question posed of "what are your fears, dy?" had so many answers. After silent deliberation, uncomfortable silence, and a pregnant pause I answered that my greatest fear would be no one realizing that I was missing or that I was hurt in my house for days - alone.

I had an epiphany that the one person that typically is always around was gone, but more importantly the average person would assume that I was just being "dy" and not being responsive to personal calls. After all, my job is to be responsive...but personally I take a break.

dyism:
Sometimes we just need to listen to the people around us, and we will learn so much about ourselves.

dyism wk of 8.17.2009

2009-08-17T10:29:00.000-04:00

I mentioned last week that it was going to be that kind of week - it was more than I could have imagined. The icing on the cake was definitely a metal piece of my car managing to scrape the concrete as I was driving on a major street. I don't know what was funnier between the car falling apart or me dolled up laying on the street poking my head under the car trying to figure out how to pull the piece off.

For five years, I have advised the college members of my business fraternity. I have helped them through classes, through financial situations, through friendship, through breakups, and overall assisting their growth from college to post grad. It has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my young life and I find myself faced with the unimaginable - death. This past weekend our world was shocked when a younger member of the our fraternity's chapter was killed. As I have been listening to their memories, I am reminded how hopeful, spirited and alive this particular member was in all our interactions. He was one of the people who kept me believing in dreams and going after your heart's desire.

dyism:
The moments that we assume we are helping others, or in fact the moment we are helping ourselves.

***before you ask - my car is not eligible for cash for clunkers.

dyism wk of 8.10.2009

2009-08-10T10:40:00.000-04:00

Do you ever have those days where you wake up, and you just know it's going
to be that kind of day? Well I woke up this morning and realized it was
going to be that kind of week. I was walking down the hall and someone says
to me "Lil miss sunshine has a rain cloud over her head". Now this is all
because I didn't smile at them, and what I wanted to say is that it's not a
rain cloud, it's a hurricane. Hmph, maybe I'll go to sleep tonight and
start the week over.

dyism:
Don't let your negative attitude, have an impact on someone else.
Negativity is contagious.

dyism wk of 8.3.2009

2009-08-03T18:07:00.001-04:00

I find myself daily seeing the impact of the recession and it's depressing. Whether it's more homeless people on the streets, more resumes in my inbox, more people attending true happy hours, people vacationing closer to home, or everyone tightening their wallets to ensure survival. What I am finding also is the concern in people's voices, and people around me not dreaming any longer. The latter by far is the saddest. I pride myself on being surrounded by people who will go to all extremes to think and act big! They help me be that random girl with no regrets...who lives her life.

dyism:
This recession may hinder income, but it does not stop our ability to find alternative means to fulfill our personal destiny.

dysim wk of 7.27.2009

2009-07-27T21:21:00.000-04:00

Sometimes you want people around that knew you when you were still forming opinions and I must say, I reconnected with a few this last week. In particular, I spent a lazy Saturday lounging with an old friend who always seems to appear in perfect timing. We were talking about life and how we never would have imagined five years ago that we would both be in our current stages of life. He commented on the fact that life is not simple but should be enjoyed and embraced.

dysim:
At this very moment, we are exactly where we should be.

dyism wk of 7.20.2009

2009-07-20T18:00:00.001-04:00

I'm listening to a hearing and looking out my window. In the last five minutes, I have seen two people physically fighting on the street, a car accident, and a man trip and fall on his face. I'll be honest and say I initially laughed at the man who face planted into the concrete, because he was so dapper in his seersucker suit. What amazed me is that he shook his head with a smirk, picked up his messenger bag and wiped his clothes off like hundreds of people weren't watching.

dyism:
Life may throw a few punches your way; just take them with a smile.

dyism wk of 7.14.2009

2009-07-13T20:03:00.001-04:00

I have a friend who jokingly calls me their therapist because I listen and offer minor commentary. I find that instead of ever truly verbally expressing my own thoughts, I just lend an ear to others. My "patient" caught me in a rare moment this past week where I actually opened up. And it was simple, I haven't been feeling valued by anything and anyone, but it's because I wasn't valuing myself.

I woke up this weekend and realized that so many of us haven't been living for the moment. We have been living for other people, aiming to make them happy and enrich their lives. At some point whether you're the talker or the listener, it gets tiring. Flip the script...

dyism:
Life is full of choices, sometimes they aren't popular.

dyism wk of 6.22.09

2009-06-22T20:10:00.000-04:00

I talked to someone today who told me their child was going nowhere and I should stop selling her dreams. I smiled and kindly said while there is reality, there should also be something that we all live for. We should surround ourselves with at least a few in our inner circle who make us feel that our dreams are not only possible, but attainable.

dyism:
Dream snatchers should be placed on a planet that doesn't have oxygen.

dyism wk of 6.15.09

2009-06-15T15:01:00.000-04:00

For the past hour, I have been watching a cafe bartender make drinksfor a variety of customers. It's been interesting to guess what eachindividual is going to order and I have been pleasantly entertained.Two business men with cosmos, the casual man with a dirty martini, acouple with a margarita(man) and jack and coke(woman), or the singlefemale with a guinness.

dyism:People will always surprise us if we give them the opportunity.

dyism wk of 6.8.2009

2009-06-08T10:34:00.000-04:00

I spend my life trying to respect others, treating them the way I want to be treated, and surrounding myself with like-minded individuals. There are a select few who by nature want to get over on life or the concept of being a good person. I have been considering if I will mess up the equilibrium of the world if I flip the script and treat people who are nasty or sub par to me the exact same way. The question is will it change the core of who I am as a person.

dyism:
Maybe the golden rule isn't so golden, I'm instituting a platinum rule.

dyism wk of 5.4.2009

2009-05-04T16:02:00.000-04:00

Each week elicits a different response from people in terms of comments about the dyism, but this past week I realized that sometimes people take my random thoughts to another level. I'm just a girl from Louisiana living in a big city, trying to figure out who I am. Isn't that what we are all consistently trying to do, heck isn't life about figuring out what makes us unique. The only difference is that I allow you a small glimpse into my quest to be dy. There's the good, the bad, the ugly, and yes the very ugly. Speaking of the ugly - as I get older my patience is growing weary for ill-managed children.

So for all of those out there that have little kiddies....if they don't know how to act, keep them away.

dyism:
Moments in life come around and they will knock you down, it's important for us to just get back up.

dyism wk of 4.27.09

2009-04-27T15:48:00.000-04:00

Have you ever had one of those days that you want to throw something large out of a window? I guess it’s a good thing the windows don't open here and that my house has window screens.

I own one cat full time, but I'm a part time mum to another. I always hear people say that over time your pets not only look like you but they start to act like you. Last night, I found it interesting that my part time cat is exactly like me. I became a bit sad and wondered why my own cat is so odd, and I had a revelation today as I was typing.....My cat has the recessive side of my personality! Good thing both of my pets get along so well together. :)

dyism:
Old sayings tell us birds of a feather flock together and that opposites attract, it's all baloney...a stupid mind game

dyism wk of 4.20.2009

2009-04-20T22:01:00.000-04:00

I watched a lifetime movie this evening and realized that not only is the acting horrible, but the lines are hilarious. I found myself enjoying the movie and I thought about the cheesiest line you could ever say. In doing this, I realized that love transcends all and we don't get too define individual couples' happiness.We define love from our experiences - even if it's only laughing about enchiladas. ;) At the risk of being a dork and embracing it.....

dyism:
When u find the person who allows you to admire a slug, stop and be thankful.

dyism wk of 4.13.2009

2009-04-13T14:34:00.000-04:00

In the last two weeks I have taken over 600 pictures. People know that when I'm around it's a guarantee that simple moments of time will be frozen by the flash of a camera. Whether it be years from now, or hours from now - I want to be able to reflect and embrace the life that I live. Don't get me wrong, all those pictures can be a bit intrusive sometimes, but that's why the delete button was invented.

dyism:
Pictures allow us the opportunity to embrace and freeze memories.

dyism wk of 4.6.2009

2009-04-06T18:14:00.000-04:00

I have a car that most people think doesn't fit my personality. It's a 97 Acura that I received as a gift in high school and she's a survivor. In our history together we've been through 3 major car accidents, it's been stolen and found sitting on cement blocks and it's had the tires slashed. Most recently though the windshield wiper fluid doesn't work, there's no air and it started smoking this weekend. Many people have told me: dy, get a car. The truth of the matter though is that I don't pay a car note, it drives 355 days out of the year and if it does break down - I know I can call on a handful of people to come rescue me. I've always told me my next car will have a driver.....who knew it would be a taxi cab or the bus driver!! Have no fear - I'm going to fix my baby this week.

dyism:
Sometimes you just need to catch the bus.

dyism wk of 3.30.2009

2009-03-30T18:43:00.000-04:00

A few years ago I decided to stop taking anything and everything for granted. You'll notice it's a theme that repeats itself in my rantings. I now make myself appreciate the here and now of simple moments. Every year I get excited about spring time to smell the magnolias and the cherry blossoms and I tell myself each year that I'm going to just enjoy them and I never do, because something always comes up (rain, work, life). This year, even though they aren't in complete bloom and it was a bit chilly - I spent hours just taking it all in and clearing my mind.

dyism:
At the end of the day, the simple moments are what make each of our lives unique.

dyism wk of 3.23.2009

2009-03-23T12:29:00.000-04:00

I managed to get in a fight with one of my best friends this weekend and watched them walk into the sunset. It's been coming for months, but I still found myself shell-shocked. With every Yin there is a Yang. I ended up the very next day reconnecting with an old friend that I lost touch with a few years ago. While the recent void can not truly be filled, I am reminded that life's clock doesn't stop ticking.

dyism:
Sometimes in order to appreciate someone, you need to grow separately without growing apart.

dyism wk of 3.16.2009

2009-03-16T17:08:00.001-04:00

I am in a phase where everything and everyone is testing me. I now wake up wondering what surprises will jump out while this random girl pursues happiness. Last week I received one of the most powerful and touching emails of my life. It said, "hey dy, i got accepted into college".

Some of you remember my escapades with my gremlins for the past few summers. I have specifically requested one of them for 3 summers because I knew with a little bit more attention he would become extraordinary. He's actually become a little brother to me. It all paid off when I received that email. Of course I remember the dollars I spent paying for lunch, but what I truly remember is forcing him to do the SAT question of the day, helping him appreciate the Internet in terms of a knowledge source, and introducing him to the true meaning of volunteerism.

dyism:
Sometimes it just takes a bit of patience, and you'll be rewarded in ways you never could have imagined.--

dyism wk of 3.9.2009

2009-03-09T23:35:00.000-04:00

For the most part I live a typical city dweller's life. This month though has been pretty sub par thus far. I was sitting in my office today editing a website and I realized that I lost my earring. I was bummed, because they were a pair of pretty darn nice diamonds. At around 7, I was shutting down my system and one of the maintenance guys knocks on my door holding my earring in his hand. He said it was right outside the door and wanted to know if it was mine. At that moment I realized how thankful I am that I am polite to everyone.

dyism:
The value of something we already own becomes apparent when you think it's gone.

dyism wk of 3.2.2009

2009-03-02T20:21:00.001-05:00

I spent the better part of last night cleaning out my refrigerator. For those who know me, it's pretty limited on what I have in there because of my work and play hours. I ended up throwing about 70% of the contents away because it was outdated. And some of it was absolutely fabulous. A few hours later I looked at my bank statement and realized exactly why I was so broke. Let's just say I'll be paying closer attention to life....

dyism:
Sometimes if you aren't observant, what's always been directly in front of you will become rotten because you keep placing it on the back burner.

dyism wk of 2.16.2009

2009-02-16T11:43:00.000-05:00

I just saw an old friend and he told me he heard that my recent bday party was so-so. 10 years ago he would have been accurate; it would have been a complete failure but as I grow, I realize how much I appreciate intimate settings. For the most part, I was surrounded by my closest friends and family that live in the area - I couldn't have dreamed of a more perfect bday! I even got some amazing flowers.

dyism:
Time changes our perception and idea of happiness.

dyism wk of 2.9.2009

2009-02-09T16:50:00.000-05:00

I was sitting in a restaurant last week and looking around wondering why there were so many kids running around and screaming. I stopped and smiled because I realized that in all the chaos there were parents taking time out of their days to instill the importance of families enjoying dinner together.

dyism:
In every storm for a few moments there is a peaceful eye.

dyism wk of 2.2.2009

2009-02-02T19:02:00.001-05:00

For the most part, I'm a southern belle who is pretty laid back and I go with the flow. I assume that people are going to do what's right and I even allow myself to believe that as a human race, we will at some point think of another person first. I've been mildly wrong lately, but you'll be happy to know - I've been calling people out left and right. My blatant comments and actions have come as a shock to some people.

dyism:
We all have an alter ego that we suppress for the most part; sometimes they deserve to play.

dyism wk of 1.26.2009

2009-01-26T13:45:00.001-05:00

In the quest to succeed at the game we call life, we walk all over those who help us master the game. I liken my life to a game of chess. I am always trying to figure out how to checkmate situations. I must say, I'm pretty good. Recently a player came along and gave me the checkmate. I'm still trying to figure out if he was a better player at the game or if I wasn't watching the board, because I needed a break.

dyism:
Never get so busy that you forget to come up for air.

dyism wk of 1.12.2009

2009-01-12T13:49:00.000-05:00

I am for the most part a dreamer, who doesn't really laugh at much. I will say when I do laugh, it's infectious. I have a running joke with a friend who always asks me "How many fish are in the sea?" and I make up an absurd answer each time. As stupid as this sounds it cracks me up; but more importantly reminds me that life is what you make of it. That's not a question that anyone mortal could ever answer accurately.
my question for you.... how many blades of grass are on this planet?

dyism:
Don't let life dictate the questions or the answers.

dyism wk of 1.5.09

2009-01-05T12:54:00.001-05:00

I haven't seen an old friend of mine in almost 3 years, and in the last two weeks I have seen him randomly four or five times. It has been amazing to see him from afar and I feel that I have caught up on most of the lapse in time. I know where he's working because of the building he's entered; I know he has exchanged girlfriends; and I know he's still crossing streets without waiting for the light. All in all...seems like he's doing great. Maybe I'll email or call to find out if I'm accurate.

dyism:
It seems that even when we aren't aware, someone is always watching.

dyism wk of 12.29.2008

2008-12-29T23:41:00.001-05:00

New Year's and Birthdays by far are the holidays that people tend to be introspective and reflect. I always seem to say "what if" as I think about the past year and prepare for the future. As I close out this year, there won't be resolutions, but more so the standard to truly live life and do the unexpected.

dyism:
Beginnings are typically pretty easy and endings are pretty hard...it's the middle that you have to relish.

dyism wk of 12.22.08

2008-12-22T23:43:00.000-05:00

I try and look for the best in everyone I meet, and every now and then you meet those people who stand out from the crowd. They have the ability to touch and mold lives in a way that can only be understood by the belief in a higher power... Sometimes it's the mother who has raised amazing children, the teacher who took that extra moment to explain, or the citizen who shares their knowledge to the community.

dyism:
Once you've found your calling, share it with the world.

dyism wk of 12.15.08

2008-12-15T23:44:00.000-05:00

I did what I never imagined myself doing...go camping. Before anyone has a comment, I've been told I was just roughing it because we stayed in a cabin. I beg to differ - we made a fire from scratch, cooked on the grill, did a nature walk in 25 degree weather, and there wasn't a bathroom in the cabin. And yes I enjoyed the experience. I learned more about the adventurist lurking in my blood.

dyism:
Do what those around you never expect you can handle, it will remind them of your tenacity.

dyism 12.8.08

2008-12-08T23:45:00.000-05:00

I'm thinking this may be the third or fourth time I've written about a taxi cab driver. I don't know what it is about me, but I attract some crazy drivers that always want to enlighten me. I used to wonder why no one else had these experiences, and I decided it's something about my smile that's inviting. I got into a cab and the driver chats me up for 30 minutes about life and how I'm young and need to enjoy every moment. He mentioned that I should always search for happiness and then says don't forget to travel. That's when I rolled my eyes and said..."My gate is Delta".

dyism:
Never allow yourself to become a commodity....when u should actually be a signature.--

dyism wk of 12.1.2008

2008-12-01T13:16:00.000-05:00

I thought about writing about the holidays, how great it was to see family/friend, and how much love and laughter they bring. Holidays almost make you forget about life's clock continuing to move. Have no fear, I watched the news. Reality Check!

dyism:
Never underestimate the greed of another human being.

dyism wk of 11.24.2008

2008-11-24T13:15:00.000-05:00

This past week - was boring. I don't remember anything standing out, being spectacular, or making me ponder about life. Actually, the only thing I can remember is learning a new vocabulary term. It was simply another week out of the year. Everything I expected to happen, fell right into place. It was a little too perfect. I realized that boring week of mine, has me quite rested.

dyism:
Embrace the simple joys of life.

dyism wk of 11.17.2008

2008-11-17T23:59:00.000-05:00

When most people call me, instead of wondering how they are doing or if they need something my brain is trying to multitask and get them off the phone so that I can continue what I was doing.

Trifling! You're never that busy for everyone. I was on the phone with my little brother last night and he told me I was on time out because I never make time for him anymore. My niece who was sitting right next to him commented and said that I always talk to her. The fact is that I do always make time for her. There is no difference in the love that I have for both of them, but I know she needs me...and I had to be reminded last night that so does he.

dyism:
Don't assume people will wait for you to figure out the puzzle.

dyism wk of 11.10.2008

2008-11-10T17:27:00.000-05:00

I found myself at a wedding perplexed and realizing that I needed to press pause on my life. At the reception, surrounded by life long friends, I realized how important love and laughter are for the world. Something still wasn't settling, and it was because I forgot the necessity of dreamers. Of course they're artsy and sometimes their ideas to the plain eye don't seem attainable. Last Tuesday I attended an election watch party, and realized that I was having such an amazing time because I was surrounded with those who have at least one of the 4 characteristics essential to my growth: living. loving. laughing. dreaming. I ended the night in Lafayette Park watching the sun rise and basking in the history we are witnessing. I realized I was with one of the few people who understand the importance of each of "my four."

dyism:
Don't ever stop embracing the characteristics that make you grow as an individual.

dyism wk of 9.8.08

2008-09-08T23:31:00.001-04:00

The more life evolves, the more life stays the same. I think it's apparent enough through this weekly vice of mine that I internalize everything around me. It seems in life the decisions people remember the most are the wrong ones. The path we choose is typically not the issue, the larger problem is that we don't attempt to rectify the situation.

dyism:
We live in a world that promotes modern day cannibalism; it is our option to embrace or denounce the concept.

dyism wk of 9.1.2008

2008-09-01T18:37:00.000-04:00

I've been going back and forth on the notion of why you have to forgive and forget and I'm realizing it's just not that simple. Two examples come to mind, the first being the more interesting. If Louisiana residents would simply forget every hurricane that wreaked havoc in history, then there would be no progress when it comes to new technology, preparedness, and lessons learned..

dyism:
To grow stronger, it isn't necessary to forget, but it is a necessity to forgive.

dyism wk of 8.25.2008

2008-08-25T21:11:00.000-04:00

While I consider myself a pretty vocal individual, there are numerous occasions when I sit on the sidelines humbly watching those around me. Lately, I've been working in a bubble. The bubble that I'm in has some amazing professionals, but when we step out of the bubble, we're surrounded by those who have no desire to do anything.

It sickens me actually to think that there are so many apathetic people. Some of you are reading this and thinking it's not apathy....I beg to differ! That's exactly what it is if you don't attempt to change your situation after years.

dyism:
Only embrace your true character, if it will make the world a better place.

dyism wk of 8.18.2008

2008-08-24T18:18:00.000-04:00

I spent the better part of 10 weeks getting to know four of the most amazing young "gremlins". If you remember, I started with six: I lost one to a jail cell and the other just stopped coming. It's their last week, and I find it fitting to update you as I end this chapter of their lives. One is returning for her second year of college and two are preparing for their senior year of high school. I have one who I was reluctant to accept at the beginning of the summer, and as we were driving to a service project today he shared with me that he witnessed the birth of his first child this weekend. He said that when he held her in his arms, he realized it wasn't about him anymore.....and he's registering for college for the first time next week. He's decided that the streets aren't always the answer.While I'm sad to see them leave, I'm ready for them to blossom. There is a song that says "don't save them. they don't want to be saved", and I finally realized some people don't know they need to be saved. 4 out of 6....not too bad for the summer of 2008.

dyism:Have insurmountable faith in people's will and desire to not destroy lives...

dyism wk of 8.11.08

2008-08-11T21:36:00.001-04:00

I'm working right now and wondering how the day would have been different if I changed a few of the variables. As I'm typing, I'm realizing that there are some fixed variables that just can't be changed. It doesn't necessarily mean something is wrong; you just have to make change, accept a situation, or walk away.

dyism:
Wondering "if" allows the possibility of a regret, which is not an option.

dyism wk of 8.4.2008

2008-08-04T19:27:00.001-04:00

The saying birds of a feather flock together must be somewhat truthful. I watched a colleague torn apart about how to truly get a message to some youth who are at risk of being lost to the streets. And it occurred to me at that moment that I attempt to surround myself with those who not only excel in their endeavors, but are willing to change the world to give others a chance.

I recently watched someone shoot down a friend's recent success. They used the word "only" when describing something that was accomplished and it made me wonder why we are so jealous of other's good fortune. What would this world be if the same person that I mentioned earlier had said "they are only another person lost to the streets."

dyism:

Remind people of their greatness.

dyism wk of 7.28.2008

2008-07-28T19:25:00.000-04:00

I find myself on any given day telling myself and others that life is an individual journey that others enter for moments. While I was talking to my summer interns, I found myself reciting this poem after one of them told me there was no way he could ever really be anything.


"Out of the night that covers me,  
 Black as the Pit from pole to pole,  
I thank whatever gods may be  
 For my unconquerable soul.  

 
In the fell clutch of circumstance         
 I have not winced nor cried aloud.  
Under the bludgeonings of chance  
 My head is bloody, but unbowed.  
 
Beyond this place of wrath and tears  

 Looms but the Horror of the shade,  
And yet the menace of the years  
 Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.  
 
It matters not how strait the gate,  
 How charged with punishments the scroll,  

I am the master of my fate:  
 I am the captain of my soul."  by W. Henley


dyism:

Choose to define your own happiness.

dyism wk of 7.21.2008

2008-07-21T18:09:00.001-04:00

I've been in a funk lately and some of you have noticed. The truth is that two years ago a piece of my inner "light" burned out. Someone very close to me was murdered, and a part of me disappeared. Last week I was surrounded by people that truly care about humanity and they reminded me how important family and friendships are to our survival. I mentioned my sadness to two people outside of my immediate family because I felt myself falling and they lifted me again.

dyism:
Reach out weekly and let at least two people know they have made an impact on your life, because time is not promised.--

dyism wk of 7.14.2008

2008-07-14T23:59:00.001-04:00

There are few times when life around you pauses to acknowledge that history is being made. I am mesmerized by my sorority celebrating 100 years of existence. It's no small feat when a person turns 100, much less an organization of women. Celebrating with a diverse sisterhood across the world who believe in devoting their lives to be of service to all mankind - let's just say, I'm deeply moved.

dyism:
Let us embrace history's magical moments......

dyism wk of 7.7.2008

2008-07-07T18:12:00.001-04:00

When most Americans think of the 4th of July, somewhere in their thoughts are fireworks, barbecue, and family. I have had the pleasure for the past two years to spend my 4th of July with some of my city's Emergency Support Function staff members. It amazes me the amount of energy, sacrifice, and support that these men and women place on allowing hundreds of thousands of citizens to enjoy a parade and some fireworks, but it's because they love helping people.

Some of you emailed me last week and asked for me to keep you updated on "my" gremlins. Let's just say it's a work in progress. This week I have one taking his GED, two taking practice SAT's, two deciding on their college schedules, and one looking for a full time job after he completes this summer. They are all focused on beginning the path to finding their mission. I do have one young man who has been with me for three summers and he told me last Thursday that he wanted to "make a statement, and not be a statistic." Of course, I had to hold the tears back and then he told me to shut up.

dyism:
Each of us has a path in life that no matter how far we run, we are always redirected.

dyism wk of 6.30.2008

2008-06-30T17:59:00.000-04:00

At about 11 a.m. all of my little gremlins (summer workers) finally came to work. Yes, I called them gremlins because I think over the weekend poltergeist entered their bodies. They were indignant, had no desire to be in the office, and two out of the six arrived looking a mess. For the first two hours of the day in between emails, I wondered why every year I get so excited to work with these little gremlins. And thank goodness, I had a pleasant reminder today. A youth from two years ago came to visit and informed me that she was going to college in the fall and that she was really excited. I'm not taking credit for her making it to college, more so for the little gremlin actually dressing appropriately. It took me that entire summer to teach her midriff shouldn't be part of her professional wardrobe. It's ironic though because at the beginning of that summer after she told me what she wasn't going to do...I told her she didn't have to like me, she just had to learn from me.

Hmmm, by visiting today she gave me enough faith to once again be ready to show them someone cares.

dyism:
Will we be patient enough to steer today's forgotten youth in the right direction?

dyism wk of 6.23.2008

2008-06-23T15:44:00.001-04:00

I find myself embracing the quirks of life by sitting in random places ear hustling on people that I have never met. Some might think I'm being nosy, I'd rather say observant. There is freedom involved with being a third party in other people's conversations. I would imagine it's like being an ant. The conversations actually have nothing to do with you, they simply are intriguing. People have no hindrances because they are in their own zones.

dyism:
Our greatest moments and thoughts may occur when we are uninhibited.

dyism wk of 6.16.2008

2008-06-16T18:24:00.000-04:00

I found myself two years ago wondering how I didn't realize what a perfect fit public service would be to my life. For 15 years I spent countless hours at dance classes. I also spent a great deal of time working for school newspapers and serving in various leadership capacities in high school and college. I think there were about 3 years after college that I lost myself. I decided to steer away from everything that apparently made me who I am. Everything is now falling back in place, and I watch others who seemingly find that their dreams as children are very in tune to the life that makes them content. Now more than ever, I think I'll be asking the question...When you were a child, what did you want to be when you grew up? It just may possibly be a glimpse into someone's heart.

dyism:
No one can interrupt the passion that lies within our soul. They may have the opportunity to question it, but that is all that can be done.

dyism wk of 6.9.2008

2008-06-09T18:04:00.001-04:00

This was my first weekend in a while that I didn't have any work or personal agenda items planned in at least two months. I found myself attending a children's dance recital. Have no fear - I'm not disturbed, I knew one of the young performers! I was reminded of how important it is for children to be engaged in extracurricular activities. They promote self-worth and more importantly keep youth focused on the positive aspects of our society. It allows me to be thankful for my upbringing and it reminds me of the need to give back to this young generation. For some of these youth, their parents may not be able to afford another year of dance, but this one year will change their lives forever.

dyism:
One of my fears in life is to forget the importance of where I have been, and how each of those experiences will mold future generations and communities.

wk of 5.12.2008

2008-05-15T08:54:00.003-04:00

I spent the day in a professional development class that focused on critical thinking. After about an hour of the class, I realized that the majority of the class participants were slackers and only attending so they didn't have to report for work. Now the trainer, I'll give kudos that she did understand the topic, but she spelled Principles wrong on the introductory slide. You're thinking right now...everyone makes mistakes, and you're right! All that to say, after lunch I decided to stop being judgmental and really listen to this group of employees' perspectives on their work and how it impacts their agencies, and more importantly our constituents.

dyism:
In any situation, if you open your eyes and your ears a piece of knowledge or understanding can be gained.

wk of 4.28.08

2008-04-29T17:57:00.000-04:00

I had a conversation last night with my cab driver who explained to methat every time someone gets in his cab, he asks them three questions.

1. Where are you going?
2. Where have you come from?
3. Have you impacted one person's life for the better?

I answered his questions and asked him why does he do this and hereplied that it amazes him how many people don't know if they impacteda life. In that 20 minute cab ride, I reminded myself of where I'vebeen...where I am...where I'm going.

dyism:Sometimes in listening to others, we find a piece of ourselves thathas been dormant.

dyism wk. of 11.26.2007

2007-11-27T16:26:00.000-05:00

I spent my first major holiday away from Louisiana, and realized that as I mature, a part of Washington DC has become home. I have a set of friends and family here that make it just as comfortable for me to be a Washingtonian. I was responsible for the macaroni and cheese for our dinner, and it was horrible; but I was proud that I ventured out and tried something different. Everybody isn't meant to be a great cook. I think I'll stick to my tried and true dishes. During Thanksgiving dinner I realized that while relationships and lives end, there are new beginnings for life and love. After all we're just living on a pendulum. With all of that said, remember tis the season to give.

dyism:
There are times when we just need a fresh start. Maybe our favorite dish is only our favorite because we haven't tried something new. It's quite often the dish was sitting right in front of us, and it just required going out on a limb.